Inspirational Woman: April 2019, Juliet

Every month on the 18th, I celebrate women. This month I sat down with Juliet, divorce and family law attorney, wife, mom and author recently features in Forbes magazine for her her book Divorce Wisdom.

We met this year through our incredible networking group, the Inner Circle with Lewis Howes. I was instantly drawn to her and her work. Having personally gone through a difficult divorce, it’s critical to have someone like Juliet who truly cares about both parties.

Meet Juliet

18th Style: Where are you from?

Juliet: I live in Vancouver, Washington which is pretty much where I have lived since I was 6.

Juliet Laycoe

18th Style: Tell us a bit about your background?

Juliet: I was raised in a typical American family.  My parents are still married and live nearby me.  I have one older brother who lives about an hour away. I followed a straight path from high school to college and then law school.  I started practicing law for a big firm in my hometown right after graduation.  Took and passed two state bar exams and worked hard to establish a practice and reputation for myself in the community.

I have had my own law firm for many years now.  My primary area of practice is divorce or family law, but I also practice in the areas of guardianship, wills and estate administration.  I work in very people-oriented areas of the law which I feel really suits my personality and strengths. I have been married 15 years and have two kids, age 7 (daughter) and 12 (son). 

18th Style: You’re a mom and wife – what’s your favorite thing to you with your family when you’re not working?

Juliet: I just enjoy hanging out with my family.  We love to celebrate holidays, special occasions and any event that warrant some celebrating.  While we like to watch movies and chill out, we also like to be active – hiking, biking, etc.  I am a runner and this past year we have been trying to get the kids to join us for various running events which has been fun.  I am also a soccer mom who is learning not to use her voice as much at games per the request of my son. 😊

18th Style: Your book, Divorce Wisdom, was recently featured in Forbes, this is an incredible accomplishment. Can you tell us why you wrote this book?

Juliet: As a divorce lawyer, I’ve been through a lot of divorces and none of them are ever easy on the people involved.  Stress, struggle and uncertainty are distracting or overwhelming for people experiencing divorce.  With all my experience navigating divorces, I felt like I could provide a practical and smart resource for people thinking about divorce or going through one.  I believe my book will help ground people during what is often the most traumatic life event they experience.

18th Style: I know we could focus the entire interview on this, but what’s one piece of advice you would give a couple going through a divorce?

Juliet: Learn and practice acceptance.  If you are the person who wants the divorce, accept that it may take your spouse some time to catch up and process the ending of your marriage.  Becoming upset with your spouse because he or she isn’t at the same place as you or ready to dive in and divide up assets won’t be productive. 

Similarly, if you do not want the divorce, accept that it is happening because denying or avoiding it won’t help you in the long run.  Further, both spouses should accept that they can’t control each other or every detail in the process.  When a person accepts the reality of their circumstances in the moment rather than repel them, they are better able to tolerate all the uncomfortable feelings (anger, frustration, fear and the list goes on), think clearly and make the impactful decisions they need to in the process.

18th Style: According to an August 2017 article in US News and World Reports, statistically, divorce is much more detrimental for women financially, in your opinion, why is this?

Juliet: I think there are probably a few reasons why divorce is more detrimental financially for women.  First, although a lot of progress has been made over the years in wage equality, women still tend to earn less than men overall according to the research. 

Second, a transition from one household to two households occurs after a divorce.  If a woman earns less than her former spouse, her income will not go as far to meet her separate household budget after divorce.  Related to this is that if a woman hasn’t had a lot of involvement in managing the household finances before divorce, there may be a learning curve for her after divorce. 

Third, women are still predominantly in the primary caregiver role for children which means they may be working less or not at all at different times during the marriage.  This impacts not only what women earn at those times but also what they are accruing for retirement and their earnings record for Social Security.  Women may also be playing catch-up in terms of their wages as they re-enter the workforce or return to full-time employment post-divorce.

18th Style: Ok, let’s lighten the topic of conversation and have a little fun. What are the last three things you bought from Amazon?

  1. Perfume for me
  2. Ski pants for my daughter
  3. Sparkly notepad for a gift

18th Style: Favorite televisions shows?

Juliet: World of Dance and This is Us

18th Style:  If you could have one superpower, what would it be and why?

Juliet: I would like to fly.  I think it would be cool to be able to see everything from higher vantage point.  It might also increase my chances of being on time if I could get there quicker.

18th Style: Favorite quote or saying?

Juliet: “Have courage and be kind.”

18th Style: Lastly, I love fun facts. Tell us something people wouldn’t know about you? It can be anything. 

Juliet: It isn’t necessarily that I don’t like orange as a color, but more of a coincidence that my least favorite foods are orange.  I don’t like yams, sweet potatoes, pumpkins, carrots or cantaloupe.  I am also not a big fan of oranges themselves. 


Interested in purchasing Divorce Wisdom?

Divorce Wisdom is available through all major online retailers like Amazon, Barnes & Noble and iBookstore.  

Click here to order on Amazon!

You can also purchase from the book website:  www.divorce-wisdom.comC

Divorce Wisdom

Inspirational Woman: March 2019, Julia

Every month on the 18th, I celebrate women. This month I sat down with Julia, hair-stylist, make-up artist and founder of Brush Beauty Inc,and B3Balm, an all-natural and organic skincare line that is dedicated to take the guessing out of what you’re putting on your skin.

We met years ago through one of my best friends from college and I have to say, Julia is one the coolest gals you will ever meet. She is all about supporting women, helping people and giving back. This is one of the many reasons why she started B3 and one of the many reasons why I am a Brand Ambassador for this incredible brand. I hope you enjoy our interview.

Meet Julia

Julia Dalton-Brush, Founder B3

18th Style: Where are you from?

Julia: NYC, I grew up in Manhattan and the Bronx.

18th Style: Tell me about your day job?

Julia: I do hair and makeup for commercial print and TV. My clients consist of NBC, ABC, FILA, Brooks Running, Tom Ford to name a few. I also own Brush Beauty, Inc and B3 Balm. Brush Beauty is a small boutique agency with artists all over the US and B3 is my new all natural and organic skincare line.

18th Style: How do you balance motherhood, life and work?

Julia: I cry and drink. Just kidding, I don’t do either of those… that much. I breath, I try to be conscious of the fact that I do the best that I can and make sure that I make the best out of the time that my daughter and I spend.

Luckily, a lot of my work is done from home now (not the makeup, of course, but B3 and the managing Brush Beauty), so I am able to pick her up from school or help her with her homework, or just sit and hang with her. I think for me it has become about priorities and realizing I can’t get it all done in a day and that that is OK. That spending time with my daughter and my husband is more important than getting the last thing for the day done – that one thing that NO ONE but me will notice if it gets done the next day instead.

18th Style: Please tell everyone more about B3.

Julia: B3 Balm is me being tired of the toxic products that we surround ourselves with. I knew it was possible to make a lot of the same things that we use day to day, make it better AND make it better for us. B3 is an all natural and organic skincare line.

As a makeup artist it was important for me to be able to give my clients something I could stand behind and, also, give them something they can use when we aren’t together – something they can use and not wear makeup too.

B3 Balm is about empowering people to feel good about themselves and, mostly, about giving people a few moments where they can breathe and pamper themselves. Sometimes, we don’t have more than 3-10 minutes in a day for ourselves. When I take five minutes to apply my skincare, it is five minutes to myself, pampering myself with beautiful and all natural products that make me feel really good and beautiful.

18th Style: What is your hope for B3?

Julia: My hope for B3 is success. Not only success in the marketplace, but success in making people feel beautiful in their own skin, naturally. We also give a portion of our proceeds to different charities and civil rights organizations, so I really hope to be able to make an impact with those donation in the future.

18th Style: How do you spend your free time?

Julia: On B3 haha. It’s new and I do it solo at the moment, so it takes a lot. But otherwise, I like going to the gym, I love sitting on my couch and mindlessly watching a show, talking and seeing friends, seeing family.

I would say my most favorite is a free day with my family where we end up taking a beautiful hike and eating out and just spending a day together making memories and having fun. I also just started taking a drawing class, I needed to do something that wasn’t work – art for art sake – something just for me.

18th Style: Who inspires you?

Julia: Ooof! There are so many. First and foremost, it was my mother who passed away 15 years ago. She was one of the most beautiful, fearless and bad-ass women I ever knew, and she was my mama.

Second, I would say my daughter. She has that same bad-ass fearlessness and it is just really cool to see who she is becoming and what she loves to do.

My husband is a constant source of inspiration. His work ethic is mind blowing and his desire to want to help and love is beautiful.

My dad who is retired from being an educator, but still does incredible and beautiful photography and my step mother who is a VP at Yale University.Talk about smashing the glass ceiling and being a boss!

Beside them, I have SO MANY talented and incredible family and friends – being a makeup artist and being able to watch and be inspired by creativity is incredible.

Also all these beautiful moms who work so damn hard, whether being home or working – being a mom is no joke and to see so many kick ass women do it in so many ways is beautiful.

18th Style: Who inspires your style and what’s your favorite store or brand? 

Julia: I have always had a love for McQueen – I think his vision and execution was mind numbing.  The beauty and old-soul darkness in his designs were some of my very favorites.  I like to think that that energy is something that drives me.

18th Style:  How would you describe your style?

Julia: I have a few different styles and it depends what I’m doing. When working, I want to be stylish, but I also need to be comfortable, so that is always a struggle. I really love the old t-shirt, jeans and boots vibe – I really only get dressed up when I have to.

18th Style: Favorite quote or saying?

Julia: “Now, for today.”

18th Style: Anything else you want to share, feel free. 🙂

Julia: Sure, I think when making life and job decisions, it is so important to look at quality of life and what you are gaining or losing by making those decisions.  Sometimes the big title isn’t worth what it comes with outside of work – I think we (myself very much included) tend to forget that we work so that we can enjoy our life and not the other way around.

I don’t want to regret not living my life and not spending time with the people I love and doing things that fulfill me, to me, that is worth making a little less money for a lotta more happiness. 


Want to try B3?

Click this link and receive 10% off your purchase by entering the code, Renee10 at checkout. xoxo

Inspirational Woman: January 2019, Emily

Every month on the 18th, I celebrate women. This month I sat down with Emily, my Goddaughter. She is a college student studying psychology. We sat down to talk about life, her favorite Instagram accounts and the challenges many girls face today.

Meet Emily

18th Style: Where are you from?

Emily: I am from Lordship in Stratford, Connecticut

18th Style: What do you love most about living in New England?

Emily: I love all the seasons and the people and the values here.

18th Style: You’re currently in school, what are you studying?

Emily: I am studying Psychology at a local community college and planning on transferring to Fordham University. I’d like to either be a 2nd grade teacher or a psychologist.

18th Style: What do you think is the biggest struggle(s) that college kids are facing today? Share anything that you can offer to other girls your age.

Emily: Some struggles college students face in my opinion are being thought of as an adult but not having everything together. Like having expenses, but not being able to pay them because you don’t have a high paying job and are going to school.

The biggest struggle I personally have a problem with is the unnecessary pressure to know what you want to do at such a young age and have to decide what you want to do for the rest of your life without having any experience. Some advice for other girls is save your money!!! And do anything you can to make yourself happy in this stressful time in  your life.

18th Style: What’s your go to podcast? Do you have one?

Emily: Ha, I don’t have one.

18th Style: What are your favorite brands/stores?

Emily: Nike, Lululemon, Kate Spade, Adidas  and Brandy Melville.

18th Style: Best thing you bought on Amazon within the last 3 months?

Emily: I bought a pair of sneakers that Nike discontinued, the last pair.

18th Style: What is favorite app and top three Instagram accounts?

Emily: My favorite app is definitely Twitter, everything on twitter is funny. My top 3 Instagram accounts are: my Godmother Renee Instagram account @18thStyle, @tanksgoodnews and any account that brings good news stories. Lastly, I love Billie Eilish’s Instagram @wherearetheavacados 

18th Style:  If you could travel to one country where would you go?

Emily: I would go to Greece, I want to have my wedding in Greece.

Em and her sister Alli

18th Style: What’s your favorite quote?

Emily: “For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.” – Audrey Hepburn

18th Style: Lastly, if you could give one piece of advice to girls, what would it be?

Emily: The most important thing that I have learned in my 20 years of life is to not care about what anyone thinks of you and to do everything in your power to make yourself and other happy. Also, the importance of family. Lastly, to young girls, especially in high school or college, there is life after both and what people think of you does not determine your worth, you do!

Inspirational Woman: November 2018, Kate

Every month on the 18th, I celebrate women.

This month I sat down with Kate, my dear friend and sorority sister from Emerson College.

She is a Resource Specialist Teacher (RST) in Los Angeles and breast cancer survivor.

Her strength, positive mindset, humor, kind heart and love for life makes Kate one special woman. I am incredibly blessed and grateful for her friendship and sisterhood.

Meet Kate

18th Style: Where are you from and where do you live now? 

Kate: I grew up 25 miles from Chicago, Wheaton, Illionis. I now live in Los Angeles, California.

18th Style: What do you love most about living on the West Coast?

Kate: The weather and the ability to ski, swim and horseback ride all in a couple of days.

18th Style: What’s your day job?

Kate: For the past 21 years, I have been a Resource Specialist Teacher (RST). I teach special education kids  with average and above intelligence and processing deficits, or that are on the ASD spectrum.

18th Style: What led you to teaching?

Kate: The reason I’m teaching and not doing theatre, when I was 37 years old, my 46 year old husband had an unexpected stroke and died. My whole world exploded. I needed to make more than I was an a actress. I had friends who walked me through the teaching credentials process and I ended up getting my 2 special ed credentials while teaching and in between breast cancer 1 and breast cancer 2.

You just do what you have to do and this was all before Facebook, so I had lost touch with all my schoolmates and sisters.

Kate and her parents at her aunt’s 80th birthday party (rare shot of all three)!

18th Style: I know the theatre is an enormous part your life, what do you love most about it?

Kate: Theatre transports you to a different place, and you get to experience many different kinds of emotions and journeys.

18th Style: You attended Webber Douglas Academy of Dramatic Art, (Central Royal College of Acting)  London, UK, how long did you live in London and what was that experience like?

Kate: I did the Graduate course for a year, stayed for another year and traveled back and forth for 7 years. The strange thing for me was when I got off the plane for the first time, my whole body sighed and it felt like I was coming home, though I’d never been there before.

18th Style: What is your favorite Broadway show?

Kate: There are too many! I love shows that I was in and others that I sang music from. West Side Story was my national tour, but I was always being in called for the Mystery of Edwin Drood. The last time they called me in for a replacement, they asked me what size shoe I wore and I asked them what size show did they need? 🙂

I loved song and dance, my go to audition song, Come Away, Hamilton, Follies, The Band’s Visit…you get the drift. Old and new.

I also love, A Chorus Line, Cats, On the Twentieth Century, Babes in Arms, Sondheim, Rodgers and Hammerstein….a ton more!

18th Style: Switching gears here, and if you’re ok with talking about this, you’re a breast cancer survivor and an inspiration to me and so many other women.

18th Style: What would you say to all the woman out there who are afraid to go for their first mammogram?

Kate: It’s no big deal and a hell of a lot less painful than a mastectomy. So suck it up and get to it! 🙂

18th Style: What message do you have for others who have been diagnosed with breast cancer?

Kate: Everyone’s journey is different, know your own body and converse with your team. Now it the time to kick its ass.

18th Style: Where are you now in your journey with Cancer? 

Kate:  After 2 bouts and 3 years of battling, I am 11 years cancer cured! My oncologist states I’m no longer a cancer patient, heck it’s not a pre-existing condition!  That’s not to say it was easy. It was my belief, I had complications that sent me to the hospital a few times and ICU once and I had to work through both times to maintain my health insurance.  But ultimately I kicked its ass and had a boob job paid for my insurance. 🙂

What I learned was asking for help does not show weakness, but strength. You are part of a team, you know your body, they know all the beneficial stuff and humor really helps. For instance, all my hair fell out except that one annoying hair on the side of my chin! Of course! 🙂

18th Style: Ok, so I like to close with a few fun questions.

18th Style: Favorite show on Netflix?

Kate: There are few, but I;m obsessed with Outlander on Starz, Romance History, and A Little Bit of Time Travel. The books are stunning.

18th Style: What’s your go to podcast? Do you have one?

Kate: I don’t have a podcast, but I listen to Sirius – The Broadway Channel!

18th Style: Best thing you bought online within the last 3 months?

Kate: My bridesmaid dress for my sisters wedding. Art Deco beaded, stunning. Check out DECOHAUS.COM

The dress!

18th Style: What’s your favorite quote?

Kate: “Everyone goes to hell in their own way.”  Thank you Grandma Karp! (my late husband’s Russian grandmother!)

My great-grandmother’s saying, “Everyone except me and thee is a little queer, and I’m not sure about thee!” 🙂 and “It’s a lot of work to remain neutral!”

Inspirational Woman: October 2018, Andrea

Every month on the 18th, I celebrate women.

This month I sat down with Andrea, my dear friend from Emerson College.

She is a full-time working mom and as genuine as they get. She has great sense of humor and one of the kindest people I know.

I hope you enjoy our interview.

Meet Andrea

18th Style: Where are you originally from and where do you live now?

Andrea: I was born in Wareham, Massachusetts, but spent my teenage years in Spring Hill, Florida. Portland, Oregon has been home for more than twenty years now.

18th Style: What do love most about living on the West Coast?

Andrea: While I joke that I’m proud to maintain my east coast “pace,” I’ve always appreciated the spirit of progress that exists out west.

Whether it’s in the arts, food or politics, there’s a tangible feeling of being able to make an impact on the world around you. There’s also a strong connection to the wilderness that is incredibly inspiring.

18th Style: What’s your day job?

Andrea: I’m Manager of Training and Support at a small database development company. I’ve worked here for 18 years, so I tend to wear many hats.

18th Style: Being a single mom is not easy. How do you balance work, life, kids and finding time for yourself? 

Andrea: Finding that balance is a process that continually evolves for me. All parents struggle with the guilt of not being there for every event or providing everything our kids want, and I feel that’s compounded for me as a single parent–especially with multiple kids dividing my attention.

I’ve tried to make peace with the reality of the structure of our life, and to appreciate the things we do accomplish every day. Because my children always come first, I’ve set boundaries with the demands of work so when I walk out the door, I’m on my time—period.

Making time for myself can be a struggle, but I’ve learned to embrace the times my kids are with their father and spend it with in the comforts of my incredibly supportive boyfriend and my inspiring group of friends.

I’ve learned to find joy in the quiet of everyday things like laundry and errands, as sometime that’s the only alone time that can be found! As a routine-oriented, structured person, learning to roll with the extremes it is something I strive to do.

18th Style: If you could have one superpower, what would it be?

Andrea: Duplication! If I could give each of my kids quality, one-on-one attention at the same time, that would solve so many of our daily hiccups!

18th Style: What’s the last great book you read that left an impact?

Andrea: My daughter has dyslexia, and I spend evenings reading with her. We recently reread “The Wind in the Willows.” It was my daughter’s choice, because we first read it when she was old enough to sit still on my lap. It’s a timeless classic filled with adventure, but has so many lessons about friendship, responsibility and appreciating what we have.

Whenever I read classic children’s books, it makes me feel like it should be required reading for adults for refresher material!

18th Style: What’s your go to podcast? Do you have one?

Andrea: I love Hidden Brain (NPR) and Stuff You Missed in History Class. I load up episodes to listen on airplanes, at work and in the car.

18th Style: Best thing you bought on Amazon within the last 3 months?

Andrea: I “treated myself” to a new phone charger and bought an obnoxious hot pink with gold trim super fast charger that was a “Deal of the Day” at $7.99. I don’t think of myself as a hot pink with gold trim person, but I was desperate to replace my charger and I didn’t feel guilty buying one at that price. Now I’m totally owning that hot pink awesomeness.

18th Style: What are your favorite three apps OR what are your favorite top three Instagram accounts?

Andrea: It’s so not exciting! It really highlights what dork I am.

1) I’m all about the Reminders app for everything from appointments and phone calls to kid stuff. I’m not sure I’d get it all done if it reminders weren’t constantly popping up for me throughout the day.

2) I frequently consult Dark Sky for weather.

3) Being a Disneyland nerd, I have an app called “Lines” with wait times, crowd levels, news and updates. It provides me with a little escape every time I use it.

18th Style: Who would you want to narrate your life?

Andrea: Kate Winslet! She’d use the proper inflection, and do it with a British accent.

18th Style: If you could be a cartoon character, who would it be? 

Andrea: The RoadRunner! He’s always on the go, outsmarting that coyote around every turn!

18th Style: What’s your favorite quote?

Edmund Spenser, “For there is nothing lost, that may be found, if sought.”


 

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